I wonder ~ wonder

why others are so different
parents don’t  “fire” *  them



* Defining “fired” I as a child believed:

For me, as a child, being “fired” meant
that my parents would not love me
and keep me.
  I didn’t know what would
disown me, not speak to me.
Maybe even send me away…
I realize as an adult, that I didn’t fear my
parents … I was just puzzled. 
I never thought of this as abuse.  I didn’t know
what abuse was as a sheltered child.  It was
not discussed except for the uncles mentioning the
razor strap that still hung on the bathroom door in
the house they grew up in.

The mystery was to me, why I could see other
families that were so different, so open,
lots of conversations, arguing, even disappointing
their parents… or disgracing as my parents would
have called some behavior. 

Family behavior as I saw and read about puzzled
me.  A real mystery as to why other families
were forgiving.  My family rigid and high
expectations.  I don’t know where I got
the idea a child could be “fired”…. I carried
the idea into adulthood.  A mystery to me.

I realized after posting the haiku 
that it
probably didn’t make any sense to anyone but me !

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