DO NOT FOLD, SPINDLE,
    OR MUTILATE
__________________________
.
It is dealing with teenagers
that the words ring a bell…
It used to be my mantra
when my kids were young teens.
“I’d like to fold, spindle or
mutilate you” ! rang loud and
clear.
.
Patience was not one of my
virtues when it came to dealing
with repetitive behavior…
one child thinking a whole roast
was snack food, not a meal
for four !
.
The same child liked to leave me
a clue that they had eaten and
had a soda  in the
living-room by leaving a cap
to their soda in plain sight on
the end table …
day after day.
The urge to do something
desperate…
my weak point of the day…
coming in the door from work !
I did not fold, spindle or mutilate,
but grrrrrrrrrrrrrr.
But the memory remains
and surfaces with the sight
of a case of Coca Cola !
I laugh now…

.
Another child would drive
me to drink…
forget fold, spindle or mutilate.
Food is often involved
with teenagers I found out.
I learned to look for missing
silverware, and jars
of peanut butter,
upstairs where food and
drink were banned.
The innocent look of
“I don’t know how that got there”
didn’t work.
And the urge to
fold, spindle or mutilate
was pushed aside.
No tv !  No radio !
No sleepovers !
.
I was reminded,
with the first child
that my banning them
to consecutive banishment
to their room would keep
them home til at least
age twenty five.
That I renegotiated,
ate my words stifling
laughter as I realized
how funny in retrospect
being a parent can be.
.
It used to be my mantra
when my kids were young.
“I’d like to fold, spindle or
 mutilate you” ! rang loud and
clear.
.
DO not fold, spindle or mutilate
is the choice…but the urge with
teenage defiant behavior remains !
.
===============
A work of fiction with an occasional
true fact thrown in. ☺.


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